Theo Ratliff Is Alive, Apparently Still a Laker

Exciting news this Thursday afternoon: the team of St. Bernards I sent into the wilderness in a final, desperate attempt to find Theo Ratliff has located its quarry. The Lakers center, who hasn't played in a game since the days of the Holy Roman Empire November 9th has, according to Mike Trudell, been rehabbing an arthroscopically repaired left knee all this time. We'll have to take Mike's word for it since I've long since forgotten what Theo's injury actually was.

Drop some manhood knowledge on us, Mr. Trudell:

After a few months of rehabilitation on his left knee, Theo Ratliff is expected to return to practice on Jan. 23 and 24, following the team's two-game road trip to Dallas and Denver on Jan. 19 and 21.... He said he feels better, is looking forward to returning to practice and ultimately contributing where he knows he can.

Sounds good. But we should probably attach some kind of tracking device to him in case he wanders off again.

(Added at 3:20 p.m. - video footage, after the jump, of our discovery of Theo's hiding place.)

As you can see from this clip, which is exclusive to Silver Screen and Roll, it was no easy matter finding Ratliff. We had to travel back in time and then to the moon. His face, which hadn't been spotted in months, appears at the 2:00 mark.

Follow Dex on Twitter @dexterfishmore.