There ain't much in the way of news regarding the Los Angeles Lakers on the horizon, but today brings merriment of an altogether different sort. News broke this morning that the Golden State Warriors will hire Mark Jackson to be their next head coach, and considering how little we care about who coaches the Golden State Warriors, this literally could not have worked out better for us all. Consider the following positive implications of this hire to Laker Nation
Mark Jackson will no longer be an analyst for the network that owns rights to the marquee NBA games (in which the Lakers just so happen to participate ... often). Really, this deserves its own paragraph, and since I'm still writing this, I have the power to make that happen. Jackson's analytical stylings are like a cross between Hubie Brown and Scotty Brooks, except if you were to remove any indication whatsoever that the speaker has ever even seen the game of basketball. No more phrases that make no sense within the context of basketball, like "Mama, there goes that man". No more phrases that make no sense within the context of the english language, like "Hand down, man down" Really, it is impossible to get excited enough about this.
Here are some other reasons:
- The Lakers are now virtually guaranteed not to have made the worst coaching hire this offseason. I'm not saying this was ever a real possibility, but plenty of us have questioned the logic behind the Mike Brown hire. Still, the man does have pedigree, having served under Gregg Popovich. Mark Jackson has served under ... I don't know. The Hamburgler? Snuffleupagus? What's Dora the Explorer's track record as a head coach?
- Jeff Van Gundy will no longer have anybody willing to rise to the bait of his ridiculous statements on pop culture, meaning they will implode upon themselves and fizzle. On second thought, this may cause JVG to create pop culture black holes that will consume us all, so lets hope some other team ends up offering him a job as well.
Submit more reasons for celebration on this joyous day in the comments.