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37 Things I'll Miss About Lakers Opening Night

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[Editor's Note: Life is filled with color. A blue sky. Green grass. Red lipstick. At sunset, you get to take your pick. Sports is the same way. Tennessee orange. Bulls red. Celtics green.  And of course, our two favorite colors: Purple and Gold. Color is beauty. Color is life. That makes death the absence of color. Every one of us likes color. That's why most of us have wardrobes with many colors to choose from. And, unless you run in certain circles, there's only one type of gathering that has no color to see.

A funeral. That's what today is, the funeral to commemorate the beginning of the 2012 NBA season. And that's why Silver Screen and Roll, joined by all of our NBA brothers and sisters of SB Nation, are properly attired ... in black. -CAC]

1.     Jeffrey Osborne.

2.     The gleam of ceiling lights off the Lakers' logo at center court.

3.     Seeing "World Peace" on the back of a Lakers jersey.

4.     Kobe Bryant's midrange turnaround.

5.     Debating whether the Thunder have surpassed the Lakers in the Western Conference food chain.

6.     The opening chords of the Pau Gasol Redemption Tour.

Star-divide

7.     Lamar Odom attacking off the dribble from the left elbow.

8.     Finding out whether Metta World Peace can still mess up Kevin Durant.

9.     Getting our first look at the Lakers' new free-agent big man.

10.  James Harden's facial hair.

11.  Quin Snyder's non-facial hair.

12.  Knowing I don't have to write or more importantly think about BRI splits, revenue sharing, the NLRB or Billy Hunter for at least the next six years.

13.  Shots of Andrew Bynum in street clothes, followed quickly by sarcastic and not-sarcastic TRADE BYNUM comments in the game thread.

14.  Making fun of how Scotty Brooks says everything in the huddle twice. EVERYTHING TWICE!

15.  Andrew Goudelock's first career three-pointer.

16.  Darius Morris' first career assist.

17.  Them Laker Girls.

18.  The kids who mop the sweat underneath the basket before free throws.

19.  BUILD A MOAT, PROTECT THE MONEY.

20.  Realizing I miss Joel Meyers and his obsession with points off turnovers. (Maybe. Just a little. I don't know, I guess I'll find out.)

21.  Booing Kendrick Perkins.

22.  Wishing Steve Blake still had someone to throw alley-oops to now that Shannon Brown's gone.

23.  A random Warriors or Trail Blazers fan trolling the game thread.

24.  Jack.

25.  "Noooooiiice!"

26.  Thabo Sefolosha shooting 2 for 6.

27.  Derek Fisher taking a charge.

28.  Calculating points per possession.

29.  Your mom. Nah, just kidding - she's still coming over tonight.

30.  Complaining after Matt Barnes shoots an off-target three when he should've been in the paint fighting for position.

31.  Thunder fans freaking over Russell Westbrook's FGA total.

32.  "There's dancing at the Vine!"


33.  Postgame GIFs and cat pictures.

34.  Starting to find out exactly what this Mike Brown character has up his sleeve.

35.  Taking the first few baby steps toward forgetting the horrors of last year's playoffs.

36.  Win or lose, overinterpreting a one-game data set.

37.  Basketball, my homies. Basketball.

Comment 54 comments  |  5 recs  | 

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37 is a random number

But lets roll with it…end this mf’ing lockout men

Twitter

Faith is remaining certain in the face of doubt. You’re not sure how it’s going to end, but you’re constantly of the belief that it will end the way you want it to and the way you always believed it to end, and that’s on top - Derek Fisher

by lakergirl on Nov 1, 2011 8:12 AM PDT reply actions  

it's metta world peace's first number with the lakers

ALSO, THE NUMBER OF WEEKS THRILLER WAS #1.

NOT RANDOM AT ALL

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 10:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

Oh silly me

Twitter

Faith is remaining certain in the face of doubt. You’re not sure how it’s going to end, but you’re constantly of the belief that it will end the way you want it to and the way you always believed it to end, and that’s on top - Derek Fisher

by lakergirl on Nov 1, 2011 2:06 PM PDT up reply actions  

Good times.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 8:44 AM PDT up reply actions  

38.

Me saying sarcastically: “Nice shot Kobe..”

by Michael_Necci on Nov 1, 2011 8:38 AM PDT reply actions  

In honor of the lockout blackout, I will not be turning on my TV this evening.

BTW, this list is hilariously awesome. Nice job, Dex.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 8:44 AM PDT reply actions  

really steamed, you guys

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 10:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

lol, good stuff Dex

Bittersweet, but entertaining nonetheless.

@brosales12

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself. -- Sun Tzu

by Ben R on Nov 1, 2011 9:09 AM PDT reply actions  

);

Brings tears to my eyes.

"It ain't Chinese algebra. If you get stops and you execute on offense, normally that team wins." - Tony Allen
"One thing LeBron James has won that Kobe Bryant never has, and never will: A bronze medal."- Josh Tucker

by steffun4tw on Nov 1, 2011 9:45 AM PDT reply actions  

I'm not going to miss our bigs not rebounding

but I am going to miss MVP 2012 ANDREW BYNAMZ DOING BYNUM SMASH!!!

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 10:14 AM PDT reply actions  

: (

I have a horrible, hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach.

by Lkrs4eb on Nov 1, 2011 10:17 AM PDT reply actions  

That's called hunger. Go eat a sammich.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 10:31 AM PDT up reply actions  

how about a cookie?

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 10:33 AM PDT up reply actions  

I only know about cuhkies.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 10:53 AM PDT up reply actions  

Katz's Deli FTW

@brosales12

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself. -- Sun Tzu

by Ben R on Nov 1, 2011 11:18 AM PDT up reply actions  

ike's place!

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions  

New York Deli in Pasadena.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions  

oh dear lord

is that all pastrami?

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 11:51 AM PDT up reply actions  

Like butter.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

i think i'm in love..

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 12:39 PM PDT up reply actions  

I love Katz's

I used to live just three blocks away.

Twitter feed: @dexterfishmore

by DexterFishmore on Nov 1, 2011 2:10 PM PDT up reply actions  

It's just fantastic. Big plus in Columbia's hat if I get into grad school there.

@brosales12

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself. -- Sun Tzu

by Ben R on Nov 1, 2011 5:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

Tacos? Unfortunately they aren't free tonight.

"Winning takes talent; to repeat takes character." - John Wooden

by Joshua S on Nov 1, 2011 3:29 PM PDT via mobile up reply actions  

San Manuel. Didn't know was so close.

You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act. - Tex Winter
Tweetness

by SoCalGal on Nov 1, 2011 10:54 AM PDT reply actions  

1800 just poured me a shot

can your tequila do that?

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 11:09 AM PDT reply actions  

This is unfortunate

Please end this lockout. Soon.

Let us all congratulate the Boston Red Sox for becoming the first World Champions in the history of sports to NOT make the postseason! Thats not easy to do!

by nyyrocks29 on Nov 1, 2011 12:21 PM PDT reply actions  

Addendum:

39: TRADE KOBY FOR LUTHER HEAD!!!!

"These things happened. They were glorious and they changed the world... and then we fucked up the end game." - Charlie Wilson
"I think that all the silence is worse than all the violence." -Lupe Fiasco

by Marty Mart on Nov 1, 2011 1:27 PM PDT reply actions  

i would've had the honor to do the first post game credits.

you know it would’ve been kobe shooting over durant’s outstretched arms as the feature photo

Follow me: @theshmoes.

by theshmoes on Nov 1, 2011 3:17 PM PDT reply actions   2 recs

I'd rec this, but I'm mobile at the moment.

"Winning takes talent; to repeat takes character." - John Wooden

by Joshua S on Nov 1, 2011 3:26 PM PDT via mobile up reply actions  

did it for you, no worries

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 3:46 PM PDT up reply actions  

40. shaqfor3's post-win Party Jeep gif.

Which would probably look a lot different this year. No Phil. Add Dwight Howard.

"Winning takes talent; to repeat takes character." - John Wooden

by Joshua S on Nov 1, 2011 3:24 PM PDT via mobile reply actions  

i'm depressed

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 1, 2011 3:48 PM PDT reply actions  

#41. CHUCKER!!!!

F*** Fairness. F*** Happy Endings. F*** Bad PR. F*** Losing. F*** Guarding 3-point Shooters. These are the tenets of the Black Mamba.
- C.A. Clark (well, except for the last one .. I added that)

by Jason78 on Nov 2, 2011 10:07 AM PDT reply actions  

chucker still gonna chuck

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 2, 2011 11:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

Sad how BUILD A MOAT! PROTECT THE MONEY!

can also be described as David Stern’s lockout strategy in full.

F*** Fairness. F*** Happy Endings. F*** Bad PR. F*** Losing. F*** Guarding 3-point Shooters. These are the tenets of the Black Mamba.
- C.A. Clark (well, except for the last one .. I added that)

by Jason78 on Nov 2, 2011 10:11 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

that's actually quite clever

Quality is our dignity. Service is our lift.

by LOOOeee on Nov 2, 2011 11:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

MISSING THE FANS ROAR WHEN KOBE SLAM DUNK

by NIGHTHAWKS08 on Nov 2, 2011 10:14 AM PDT reply actions  

and 1!

Are you free tomorrow?
"No. I'm friggin' expensive."

by crushmybones on Nov 2, 2011 10:34 AM PDT reply actions  

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