Lakers All-Suck team 2000-2009

For every great player we watched dawn the purple and gold over the last 10 years, there were some who we would like to forget.  This is the list that commemorates those players.  

Starting 5:

Point Guard:  Smush Parker (2005-2007)  

After being an NBA journeyman and playing briefly overseas, the Lakers signed him to a contract in the 2005 offseason.  As we all know, the team was in complete ruin after the Shaq trade and since the Lakers didnt have a viable secondary scoring option, he and Lamar Odom became the two main contributors offensively outside of Kobe.  Thanks to his gig with the Lakers, he looked actually like a decent NBA player averaging about 12 ppg on 44% shooting.  Late in the 2006-07 season, Smush clashed with Phil over his playing time and lost his starting job to Jordan Farmar.  The Lakers chose not to re-sign him and he returned back to his original level of shittiness with the Heat and Clippers before eventually falling out of the league.   In an interview from a year ago, he called playing with the Lakers and Kobe an "overrated experience," which shows how much of an ungrateful douche he was.  Nowadays, Smush Parker plays in front of ten adoring fans in Siberia.  

Shooting Guard:  Kareem Rush (2002-2005)  

Kareem saw little use in the first year of his NBA career, but later on he took the role of being a 3 point shooter.  In probably the best game of his career he shot 6 for 7 from the behind the arc in game 6 of the Western Conference Finals to help propel the Lakers past the Timberwolves.  A few games into the 2004-05 season he was dealt to the Charlotte Bobcats for second round draft picks.  Rush played for a few more teams before being waived by the Clippers midway through this past season.  He shot a dazzling 34% from the field in his career with the Lakers.

Small Forward: Bryon Russell (2003-2004)

Bryon Russell played most of his career on the Jazz and like his fellow compadres, was denied a chance at a ring by the Bulls.  In a last ditch effort, he joined the Lakers along with Gary Payton and Karl Malone for a championship run in 2003.  As we all know, the team imploded in the finals.   Not really much else to say about Bryon Russell, except that he shot 40% from the field and averaged 4 ppg.  Oh, and he challenged Jordan last year to a pick up game.  Smart idea, Bryon.

Power Forward:  Brian Cook (2003-2007)  

Before the the time of Josh Powell, aka ICBM (Intermmediate Close-up Brick Master), there was Brian Cook, the original ICBM.  In Cook's first season, he got saw very limit action behind the Big four Quartet.  He soon became known as a perimeter shooter, well a bad one.  In the 2004 offseason, Shaq left town, and as a result he saw more minutes during the new season.  He also started taking more three pointers as well.  In 2006, Cook achieved career highs in FG%, points per game, and shot 43% behind the arc.  As expected, his production would drop off from there and his minutes would decrease as well.  In his final games as a Laker, he shot a combined 4 for 21 from the field before he was dealt to the Magic along with Mo Evans for Trevor Ariza.  He was signed this summer by the Clippers.

Center:  Kwame Brown (2005-2008)  

 In probably the worst trade of the Mitch Kupchak era, the Lakers shipped away Chucky Atkins and an up and coming guard in Caron Butler for the much maligned Kwame Brown.  Brown in his years with the Wizards showed a lack of work ethic and failed to meet the lofty expectations for the first pick in the draft.  He eventually became the starting center for the Lakers when the great Chris Mihm was lost for the season after injuring his ankle in a game against the Sonics.  He had a decent first season with the Lakers but in the playoffs made one of the biggest mistakes defensively.  With the Suns trailing by 3 in the waning seconds of game 6 of the first round playoffs, Tim Thomas got the ball and was able to get Kwame Brown to jump out of position with a pump fake, allowing him to drain the game tying three.  The Lakers went on to lose the game in overtime and lost the series in 7 games.  Thanks Kwame.  

In the next two seasons, he played in a limited amount of games due to injuries, allowing Andrew Bynum to finally get some playing time as well as the starting job.  Then in 2008, Bynum was lost for the season with a knee injury, forcing Phil to put Kwame back into the starting 5.  In his final games with the Lakers, he showed off his amazing ball handling and passing skills (see below).   On February 1st, Kwame was traded along with Javaris Crittenton, Aaron McKie, and some draft picks to the Memphis Grizzlies for some guy named Pau Gasol.  He worked out ok, I guess. Kwame Brown now is with the Charlotte Bobcats, reuniting with his old pal, Michael Jordan.  

Honorable Mention/ Bench:

Mark Madsen  (2000-2003):  Probably more remembered for what he did at the Laker parades than for anything he ever did on a basketball court.

Slava Medvedenko (2000-2006): Did an awesome job of defending Rasheed Wallace in the finals when Karl Malone's knee gave out.

John Celestand (2000): John Celestand sighting in this clip for like 2 seconds.

Adam Morrison (2009):  There is no way this list would be complete without some AMMO love.

Chucky Atkins (2004-2005): Chucky made this three pointer:

Chris Mihm (2004-2009):  Got into a fight with former Laker great, DJ Mbenga.  His whereabouts ever since are unknown.