Pat Riley's Sexiness



My girlfriend told me that Pat Riley is one of the sexiest men she has ever seen on television.  So, if she knew the following story she would probably want to have his kids.  

Background information:

During the 1985 Finals the Lakers faced the Celtics and they got their ass kicked during game 1. The beat down was so bad that to this day it is known as the Memorial Day Massacre.  Although the Celtics beat the Lakers with a score of 148 to 114 in game 1 the Lakers still won the title in 6 games.  But it was what happened after game 1 that changed the series.

After that game Riley said that misery was the best state because it was then that you find out what you have inside. So, in order for Riley to find out what his players had inside he calls a team meeting the following day which is usually when the team would go over video footage of the previous game.  

The following is Cooper and Magic's versions:

Cooper's version:

It was just like a 30-minute video but Riley sat there and replayed it.  Every time you fucked up, he'd rewind it five times.  You just sat there and saw yourself fucking up five times.  

It literally stayed on Kareem.  And would say, "Cap, look at how this guy is beating you down the floor!"  I thought he had literally gone crazy, just totally lost it, 'cause he wasn't maniacal, he was silent....I was waiting for Kareem to say, "Hey, Riles, fuck this, lets get on," but he never said anything.  He'd just shake his head and continue to watch.

And he went down the line-Kareem, Magic.  He went through all the starters.  He went systematically to everybody.  Once the video was over, the guy stood up, put the remote down and he proceeded to go off on us verbally.  Tried to put his fist through the back of the chalkboard.  The Chalk went flying.  People who were sitting up front looked like they were at the movies when it gets scary.  Things were happening!

Magic's version:

He came out and he started, "You guys call yourselves the Three Musketeers?"  "You guys ain't crap"  He was talking about the guards.  "DJ's kicking your ass, Buck!  Danny Ainge is just intimidating you, Byron!"  

Down the line, he just made you feel like you were this tall.  And Kareem, he got to Kareem, just called him every name in the book.  "You're supposed to be our captain, our fucking leader!  You didn't even show to play! This is the world championship!  They just took it to you!  And What makes things worse, Greg Kite came in and did it to you! And what makes it worst, Buck, you foul DJ and then you pick his ass up!  We're down 40 points.  If one man picks up a Celtic, $500 fine!  If there's one layup-one layup!-another fine! No box out, another $500!"

It was the greatest coaching strategy that I've ever seen.


If any of you want to read similar stories I suggest you read Madmen's Ball which is where I got this story from.  Dam, come to think of it,  after sharing this with all of you I think I would have Riley's baby to.  Either way, in my eyes Riley will forever represent purple and gold.  

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