LeBron Hates the 1st Amendment, Getting Dunked On
The path to authoritarian rule is depressingly familiar, and one trod by many a nation in the postcolonial Third World. Cleveland, as you prove time and again, you're still part of the Third World, and now you've rounded out the profile with some classic media repression. Let's review the cautionary tale.
The process goes like this. First arises a charismatic figure, promising to lead the masses against power-wielding elites (e.g., foreign capitalists, the World Bank, the Lakers). After a few dubious but kind of inspiring triumphs - "We've nationalized our oil industries! We got swept in reached the NBA Finals!" - the brave revolutionary is crowned president for life. Anthems to nation-state glory are composed, slogans are coined, bad portraits of the dear leader are rendered in the style of socialist realism, and a people's future seems fair and bright, even if the road to reaching that utopian end-state is suspiciously opaque....
The initial warning signs can take a few different forms. Reformist politicians are sometimes jailed for ill-substantiated "crimes." Opposition political parties are abolished. Sometimes whole organs of constitutional government are dissolved in the name of "emergency rule." And then there's the classic, and indispensable, move of suppressing any media content that might prove embarrassing to the regime.
So LeBron, anything of interest happen at your recent Skills Academy?
On Monday, Jordan Crawford, a sophomore at Xavier (by way of Indiana), reportedly dunked on LeBron during a pick-up game at the LeBron James Skills Academy. Garry Parrish of CBSSports.com wrote that one high school player said, "it was bad". (We can only assume he meant "bad" in the Michael Jackson sort of way.)
LeBron must have agreed, because he had Nike officials confiscate the two videos that were taken of the dunk. (Parrish blames Nike, but reading between the lines it seems like the censorship was orchestrated by LeBron himself.)
Nothing to see here, folks. Please move along to your designated re-education centers and Productivity Workshops. You, with the video-enabled iPhone! We have a special prize for you, just through the black door into the windowless room. No, no need to tell your loved ones where you're headed....
Clevelanders: totalitarianism is slowing descending on you. I realize your obsolete industrial infrastructure and funereal climate make you an ideal candidate for Eastern Bloc-style single-party rule, but there's still time to preserve what's left of your freedoms.
DEMAND the immediate release of all videos showing LeBron getting dunked on or otherwise worked by college kids!
INSIST ON a full accounting of any other such videos that have been suppressed by this increasingly brutal regime!
CREATE a dedicated YouTube channel for all such videos, that the world may be witness to his misdoings!
INTERSPLICE Keyboard Cat into as many such videos as possible!
RISE UP AND CALL FOR LeBron to be waived by the Cavaliers and made to answer before the War Crimes Tribunal in the Hague!
You have nothing to lose but third-round playoff exits!
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Comments
Lebron is VERY aware of his image. His image might be more contrived than Kobe’s…. Anyway Lebron should know just because you get dunked on doesn’t make him any less of a player, it doesn’t take away from how great he is, it just means he got dunked on. It happens. It’s kind of sad how he demanded all the footage to be confiscated.
But because Kobe sneers when he plays!
That must mean his image is contrived, right?
—Yours truly, Bill Simmons
Lebron the Baby - Greatest Steal of His Career
As the tapes are confiscated, Lebron James can be seen on the court, grinning. Ironically, while this stat will never be recorded (just like the videos), Lebron is satisfied with the greatest steal of his career.
…
Meanwhile, over at Kobe Bryant’s Summer camp…
Kid: “You won’t be able to win at Lebron’s camp!”
Kobe: “I also won’t get dunked on in my own camp.”
Ironically, this small jab by Kobe towards Lebron is probably about the best action we’ll be able to get this summer from the the two superstars after hopes of a Kobe-Lebron (and puppet friends) Finals matchup fell through in June…thanks to Lebron. And like always, Kobe wins. Lebron? Well, he sure can steal better than Kobe can. ‘Check hisstats.’
link:
http://ohmeohmyjellosjigglin.blogspot.com/2009/07/video-tame-james-greatest-steal-of-his.html
LOL
I can’t blame Lebron for wanting to confiscate that vid.
He’s built an empire based on his own image of strength and power – getting dunked on, is kinda the opposite of that.
That being said, who cares if you’ve been dunked on. Most NBA players will get dunked on – no matter what – at one point or the other in their careers. It just comes with the territory.
Confiscating the video is kind of sad. But I’m not one to judge, so I hope whoever else has footage of the video will release it.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 1:49 PM PDT reply actions
BTW, why are we always posting Lebron news on a Lakers blog?
don’t get me wrong, and this is not a critique on you, DexterFishmore, I like that we’re criticizing LBJ, but why exactly are LBJ related news posted on the front page and not in the Fan Shots. it’s just a little odd, like too much LBJ everywhere, even on a Lakers blog.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 2:20 PM PDT reply actions
This is a Lakers Blog BUT it is also an NBA blog.
LeBron is news. To not talk about him would be wrong. Too many times I see blog where the visitors are ignorant about the rest of the NBA.
Personally, I consider myself an NBA fan, then a Lakers fan. And I love the Lakers. Plus, there isn;t a lot of news to post. I do the links, and right now, there just isn’t anything good to post.
true true
I just get tired of seeing his u-g-l-y uglay face everywhere lol
let’s talk about hot nba players. like how dreamy TA is … okay, I’m a girl, I can’t help it.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 3:46 PM PDT up reply actions
YAY Fellow Laker fangurl!!
just a heads up when crazy fangirling happens on my side.
Y’all will know why.
Don’t be surprised if you find a comment somewhere that’s along the lines of “Kobe, y u so hot, bb?” lol
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:29 PM PDT up reply actions
I would have never guessed either of you were guys.
Does that sound wrong? I don’t mean it in a bad way. I just never met a female that digests as much you you do, intuitive. There are plenty of times you are finding stuff that Gils or I can link.
I know a few girls whom are big into sports, but none of them actively follow blogs and read newpapers, online, etc.
It’s fun to discuss :) Why not? It’s not like there’s any real exciting Lakers news to talk about. Talking about how SB Nation got a new application for Twitter and cell phone commenting can only be talked about so much.
LOL
I want to see the Ron Artest conference. I heard it was entertaining.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 3:47 PM PDT up reply actions
http://cbs2.com/video/?cid=193
Click the “WEB EXTRA: Lakers introduce Ron Artest”
That should be the one
Thanks!!
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Sorry if this is off-topic, I'm not sure where else to put this
But I just realized the Lakers have $7 million in expiring contracts next year ($12 if you include Fisher but he’s not going anywhere). Obviously I think Buss will sit on the contracts, because he’s trying to save money for future seasons. But the point is that we do have some trading chips if the need arises.
We have one true need, as I see it – a competent backup SG. If Sasha continues to suck, his levels of suckitude might tempt Artest into ripping his head off, leaving us without a backup SG. If this dire situation arises, we can either 1) play a headless Sasha, 2) play Brown at the 2, or 3) see if we can pull off a trade.
I always liked Maurice Evans’ style of play. I’d prefer more of a sharpshooter, though. I think Delfino could be solid in such a limited role, but he’s in Europe and we can’t sign any free agents. Evans is reasonable because I can see the Hawks taking some of our scraps for him. But I wouldn’t trade Farmar for Evans, even now, because Farmar still might turn it around. There must be someone out there better than Evans but still within our reach.
Any other reasonable candidates out there to keep an eye on?
Haha, let's just play the headless Sasha
If he’s not thinking about his shots, he may make more of them and not the horrible fadeaway jumpers to the baseline that made be cringe whenever he attempted one.
But in all seriousness, I think Brown could spell Kobe at the two if necessary. He has the length and size to guard two guards if the situation calls for it. Phil also could play Artest at the two for largely the same reasons.
As far as trades go, Evans sounds like a good choice given that he’s played here and Atlanta has a ton of free agents to bring back. If we traded Morrison and some cash to cover his buyout, that could potentially work. I’m not sure who else we could potentially trade for though, largely because the direction a lot of teams are going is so amorphous. For instance, if Phoenix really was blowing things up, we probably could have Barbosa for Farmar and Morrison, but Barbosa is a pretty affordable player for his production and I’m not entirely sure Kerr wants to part with him.
To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself.
Some other news: http://www.myfoxhouston.com/dpp/sports/nba/090708_rockets_ariza_yao
Rockets used the disabled player exception to sign Ariza. That means they still have their MLE to sign to who ever they want. I guess Yao will be out for at least a season. That really stinks, I really like Yao as a player.
I think he has a PR team
They just need to get fired and get a new set. LoL
But in all seriousness, great post – I like the parallels you created simply put I am not a LeBron fan. He’s an amazing player – the next great one after Kobe – but it doesn’t mean he gets all these passes just cause he has yet to grow up (maturity wise) and learn how to shake hands and laugh off someone slamming one on you.
Before anybody puts me on as a anti-LeBron/hater, you have to face facts that this past month or so hasn’t been good for him. He walks around with shirts that say “”http://ratemyfresh.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/lebron-wearin-mvp-shirt.jpg" target="new">LBJ/MVP" and “”http://lh6.ggpht.com/_YODg65nll_o/SkIrfVUqMtI/AAAAAAABzkY/Xf7f_skW1R8/s400/news_lebron-james-check-my-stats-1.jpg" target="new">Check my $tats“, and snubbed not only his fellow Olympian teammate when due congrats were deserved, but also the media which is a huge no-no in today’s obsessed media world. You think ”http://www.ohiomm.com/blogs/mcmanamon/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/lakers-celebration-2.jpg" target="new">Kobe wore his shirt to mock people? No, most likely Nike gave it to him to wear and he has contractural obligations to do so – those things sold faster than ice cream on a hot summer day. But if Kobe hadn’t had that rape trial back in ‘04 do you think there would be any other heavy media scrutinization on him? The Chinese LOVE Kobe – even more than LBJ, Yao Ming, or any other superstar. LeBron made himself to be the people’s champion, but its catching up to him now that he’s invited the media into his backyard, they won’t leave and will follow up on him in everything he does. Kobe’s embraced that fact and always makes sure to play with the media, or give some solid comments and back off into the gym, ice bath, or 7 am workout session.
If anything, LeBron didn’t even go get the tapes himself – he got Nike representatives to do it for him. I’d wager a guess and say that, LeBron just really needs to grow up and face that he’s a role model now, and any little thing he does will set off a media blaze, good or bad.
Also, about why we post about other players/things other than the Lakers? We’re all anxiously waiting to hear about Lamar Odom… *sigh
EH
Find the latest in stars * media * hype+ * sports * fashion
@ STRKNG LIGHTS BLOG (http://streakinglights.blogspot.com/)
Looks like Karl Malone's little brother...
"A bizarre and extremely rare hybrid Blazer/Laker fan, Timbo has always struggled to contain the Beast Within, like Dr. Jekyll, Bruce Banner, or Ted Kennedy." — Miled Animal
lol is that an actual picture?
we better get used to it though, we’re gonna be seeing it all season long
EH
Find the latest in stars * media * hype+ * sports * fashion
@ STRKNG LIGHTS BLOG (http://streakinglights.blogspot.com/)
by STREAKINGLIGHTS on Jul 8, 2009 2:45 PM PDT up reply actions
I know that, just a little surprised its out already
EH
Find the latest in stars * media * hype+ * sports * fashion
@ STRKNG LIGHTS BLOG (http://streakinglights.blogspot.com/)
by STREAKINGLIGHTS on Jul 8, 2009 2:49 PM PDT up reply actions
http://www.spurstalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=130756
EH
Find the latest in stars * media * hype+ * sports * fashion
@ STRKNG LIGHTS BLOG (http://streakinglights.blogspot.com/)
by STREAKINGLIGHTS on Jul 8, 2009 2:50 PM PDT up reply actions
he looks like DJ's brother
just looks so weird in the P&G colors.
AHHHHHH!!! I still can’t wrap my mind around it!!!
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 3:49 PM PDT up reply actions
*sob* I want TA back :(
I can’t help it … trying so hard to accept RA
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 3:54 PM PDT up reply actions
:(
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:30 PM PDT up reply actions
:(

Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:31 PM PDT up reply actions
notice the PURPLE tie?
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:36 PM PDT up reply actions
bawlin

Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:39 PM PDT up reply actions
this just looks weird Trevor why??? why did you have to go man, dag
There are basic Fundamentals that are needed to move forward in this game. Always keep your guard up at all times to avoid being caught in a trap. Overcome the fouls that will be commited against you REBOUND AND PRESS ON. ADJUST to the LimeLight: ALL-STAR PLAYERS ARE ALWAYS THE CENTER OF ATTENTION. Know what your role is and play your position. Find a game plan and execute it. REMEMBER YOU ONLY GET OUT OF THE GAME WHAT YOU PUT INTO IT.
Is this a case of a writer tilting at windmills, jousting with imaginary giants, and completely missing the mark?
Or is this some post-modern, self-reflexive spoof of fanposts?
I’m not sure.
I mean it’s unclear whether LeBron orchestrated this affair or not. When the object of ridicule is in question, any attempt to skewer it is dubious. IMHO, this piece is less about LeBron’s ego or Nike’s brand management and more about the author’s smug stupidity and vacuous silliness.
"I've hacked into your brain. You're throwing a party and no one's showing up."
Ever heard of the term satire?
LeBron was reported by more than a few sources that he talked to Nike to get rid of the tapes. Case closed.
EH
Find the latest in stars * media * hype+ * sports * fashion
@ STRKNG LIGHTS BLOG (http://streakinglights.blogspot.com/)
by STREAKINGLIGHTS on Jul 8, 2009 3:45 PM PDT up reply actions
Can you conceive of a failed attempt at satire?
In any case, even if there are sources testifying as to LeBron’s complicity, what do you make of the others pointing the finger at Nike? You have willfully ignored them to satisfy your prejudices.
Oh, and case closed? Is that what you go around saying to settle unanswered questions, you arrogant clown? I guess I’m going to have to accept your interpretation of things, because there’s no disputing anything affixed with the STREAKINGLIGHTS GRAND SEAL OF APPROVAL. Not!
You’re ridiculous, man. Case closed!
"I've hacked into your brain. You're throwing a party and no one's showing up."
Why so presumptuous?
I am amused, not angry.
And why are you telling me how I should feel and what I should do? It’s as if you think you’re actually in a position of authority. Or are you some wise, benevolent clown, graciously dispensing sage advice?
Am I supposed to take you seriously, homie?
"I've hacked into your brain. You're throwing a party and no one's showing up."
LOL
Yeah, you’re definitely not angry………………wink, wink.
Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch! You just shot an unarmed man!.......Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend. – Will Munny
Yeah, but more is still better...........
as long as they don’t get “angry”.
Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch! You just shot an unarmed man!.......Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend. – Will Munny
“It sure was a long time coming,” Artest said. “I always wanted to be a Laker — not coming out of college; I wanted to be a Knick. As I started to compete against the Lakers and against Kobe [Bryant], just really out of respect for him I always wanted to be a teammate of his.”
But, but, but.. no one wants to be Kobe’s teammate! He’s a bad teammate, haven’t you heard? Artest is not going with the script! What will Simmons write about now? :) tehehe
+1
Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch! You just shot an unarmed man!.......Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend. – Will Munny
:(

Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:30 PM PDT reply actions
notice the PURPLE tie?
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:36 PM PDT up reply actions
tearin' up

Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 5:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Well
At least he’ll only have to wear it for 82 games, so he’s got that going for him.
Bills make me wanna SHOUT!
by silverstreak3k on Jul 8, 2009 7:32 PM PDT via mobile up reply actions
for five years in a row ....
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 11:36 PM PDT up reply actions
there was a link a few days ago ( i think from LA Times) that mentioned the favorite to win next year, and it was cleveland. the lakers were second.
was that before or after the RA deal?
because no offense to Cleveland and Shaq and Lebron, but they’re not getting by a healthy Boston or Orlando team.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 8, 2009 11:36 PM PDT up reply actions
Lebron
There is no excuses for taking this video away from everyone eyes because now your image looks worse. More worse then letting us see the video and laugh about it and giving you credit for having the guts to show such things at your camp but NO and now everyone will see you in a different light. But who knows it might have been a really really embrassing dunk all in his face so maybe it would of did alot of damage but sure enough Lebron does the damage without the video.
There are basic Fundamentals that are needed to move forward in this game. Always keep your guard up at all times to avoid being caught in a trap. Overcome the fouls that will be commited against you REBOUND AND PRESS ON. ADJUST to the LimeLight: ALL-STAR PLAYERS ARE ALWAYS THE CENTER OF ATTENTION. Know what your role is and play your position. Find a game plan and execute it. REMEMBER YOU ONLY GET OUT OF THE GAME WHAT YOU PUT INTO IT.
I think i'm going to BE SICK
seeing Ron Artest in purple and gold and Trevor Ariza in that AWFUL/UGLY red strip (I refuse to call it a uniform) worn by the Rockets.
I drowned my sorrows away yesterday in vodka and cranberry juice, I felt better when I saw the articles about LeDunkedon James, but then I had to go and see Trevor in that plain awful red strip!!! It felt as if the ground moved from under my feet. Just when I though it couldn’t get any worse…….guess what I SAW RON FREAKING ARTEST WEARING A LAKERS JERSEY!!!!!!
How the hell did this happen? Please tell me this is some alternate reality like an earth two or earth prime or something!!!
One thing’s certain though……..there’s going to be a HUGE increase in the sale of apple flavored vodka and cranberry juice……why you ask? because i’m going to be using it A LOT until I get used to seeing Crazy Pills wearing the jersey of my beloved team.
David Lee happened. That's what. :(
And Yao Ming was out for the season.
Lakers 2009 Road to Redemption: TREVOR, DEREK, LAMAR, PAU & KOBE.
Play the game of which Lakers reminds you of: TA - TI, Shannon Brown - Chris Brown, Pau Gasol - Jesus, Machine - Luis Scola/Russell Brand, PJ with mustache and beard - Colonel Sanders.
by PeanutButterSpread on Jul 9, 2009 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions

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